How to ask a financial services client for a referral without pressure

A client who recommends you is lending you their name, and in this trade the name is attached to someone's savings, cover or loan. That is why "do you know anyone who needs insurance?" can earn a polite no. Ask for a person in a situation, at a moment when you have just done the job well, and make the no easy. Do not tie the introduction to a product, a target or a reward.

The general method for asking is in how to ask for referrals without making the customer uncomfortable, and how a professional firm asks covers the version for practices. This post covers what is different when the product is other people's money.

Why does a plain ask sound like pressure here?

A client who recommends a tailor risks a badly stitched shirt. A client who recommends you risks a friend's money. Clients know it, so an ask that sounds like your quarterly target can make them back away.

Clients also seldom describe what you do. They say "they came to the hospital when my father died", which is a story and not a pitch. Your ask has to leave room for that story. A request framed around your product list pushes it out.

When is the moment right?

When something has gone well and the client has said so. A claim settled, a child's fee paid from the money you helped set aside, a review meeting where the client said "this is clear now". The mood is relief or gratitude, and the client is looking back and not worrying.

Do not ask at onboarding, at a renewal that cost more than last year, after a market fall, or while any claim of theirs is still open. And do not ask a client who is unhappy about a delay until it is settled and they have said they are comfortable. An introduction from someone you have just let down puts both of you at risk.

What does the ask sound like?

Name a situation the client can picture, let them pass on your number instead of giving you theirs, and say out loud that there is no pressure.

I am glad the claim is closed. If someone you know is going through the same with a parent's policy, you are welcome to give them my number. Only if it feels right to you. There is no pressure from my side.

If the client likes to be more active, offer a second form: "Would you like me to write two lines you can forward, so you do not have to explain what I do?" That puts the friend in charge of the next step.

Where does an ask go wrong?

Take an invented term-insurance adviser in Patiala who has just settled a claim for a farmer's family. At the thank-you visit the adviser says: "If you send me three families like yours, I will do a free review for each." The farmer goes quiet and later tells the family that the adviser "wanted something back". No name ever comes, and the next renewal call is cooler.

The adviser made two mistakes. Attaching a reward may break rules the registering body has set, which the adviser should have asked about first. And asking for three turned a favour into a quota. At the next claim the adviser uses the script above and adds nothing else. A cousin's name comes, but only after a second visit, and it leads to a phone call that goes nowhere. In this invented case one introduction in a year is the whole return, and that is a fair result.

How do you handle the introduction once it comes?

The client has given you a reputation along with a number, so go carefully.

• Ask how the client wants it done: you call, they message first, or a group chat.
• Say who suggested you in the first line, only if the client agreed.
• Carry nothing across. The new person must never hear about the client's money, claims or loans from you, even without names, in a town where everyone knows everyone.
• Tell the client afterwards, in a line, that you spoke. Skip the details.
• If the friend says no, leave it. Pressing a friend because a favour is owed is how you lose both.

What if the client offers a name you should not take?

It happens. A client offers a brother-in-law who owes them money, or a neighbour they have just quarrelled with. Another offers a colleague who works at a lender you deal with, and a conflict of interest follows. Thank the client, say you would like to keep that one for later, and give a reason that is about you: "I want to give them a proper hearing, and I am full this month." Do not give a reason that criticises the other person.

Whether you may serve a friend or relative of an existing client differs by product and body. Ask your compliance contact for a standing rule so you do not decide it case by case at the client's door.

What if clients simply never refer?

Some clients never recommend anything to anyone. Do not build a plan that needs every client to produce a name. Watch instead for the ones who already bring a family member or a business partner into meetings unasked. They are the likelier referrers, and they need good service and an easy way to pass your number on.

Make the friend's checking-up easy too. A friend given your name will probably look you up, so a Google Business Profile with your address and a plain description is worth having.

When should you not ask at all?

Skip the ask if a client is a relative, an employee of a lender you work with, or anyone for whom an introduction creates a conflict. Skip it too if the client is facing a loss or a family illness, and if you cannot honestly say you have done your part. An ask that arrives before the work is finished sounds like a sale.

Write your own ask for one client

Choose one client who has thanked you in the last year and write the ask in your own words, naming the situation. Say it once at your next conversation, then note what the client said, not whether you got a name. If it felt wrong, change the wording and not the client. The wider picture is on the financial services hub. If you want help setting it up for your office, see customer referral programmes or tell us what you need.